pprof’s 2008 website

Last year I organized a Christmas concert at our department. This year it’s The Christmas Thing. If you’re in Kosice next Tuesday (Dec 9), say, around 5 p.m., just make a trip to Petzvalova 4 (Faculty of Arts) and be a part of it. For further details and the poster, please, click here.

Forgive me if you’ve seen this before but I just came across this today and thought it was totally hilarious. But, please, keep in mind there are many Europeans whose knowledge of the US is quite the same (yes, I’ve got proof).

A couple of days ago, a comment on Campus Comedy’s YouTube channel revealed an inconvenient truth, a fact I wish I had learned some ten years ago: I never should have been a teacher.

In this comment a former student, identifying himself as Vladko Putin, stated:

Jarko zas robi pakoviny…:D vidno ako sa venuje praci :DD klasika Marcinovska.. Ja som len zvedavy ci aj na vysokej skole teraz namiesto ucenia angliny zase len Futuramu pozeraju :DD blb

implying that I had hardly ever done anything with my high school classes and was I any better now. Truly an inconvenient truth — especially for a person who loves teaching as much as I do and sees it as his calling, rather than a mere profession.

Ironically enough, just like the Al Gore movie, the author failed to see the inconvenient truth about himself: that he hardly ever attended the classes and was constantly absent during testing times. So, quite like Al Gore preaching on environmental issues despite his sky-rocketing utility bills; here was someone literally pulling a speck of dust out of my eye and not seeing the plank in his own eye (Matthew 7).

And as if that were not enough, both Vladko Putin and Al Gore claim to be members of the same Christian denomination. Talk about inconvenient truths! How can you say you’re Christian when your actions give you away? Jesus used the H-word for this kind of people: hypocrite.

And while we’re on the subject of inconvenient truths, why don’t I share some more: I taught EFL at a Slovak high school for five years. 4.5 years out of that I taught 24/25 classes per week. On top of that I had an English drama club (4 years) and was a “class teacher” (2 years). It was extremely exhausting.

Now I’m teaching at a university. The teaching load is much more bearable. But I’m expected to be writing articles and going to conferences although I have to buy my own books and pay for all the travels and conference fees. Yet even in ordinary months I (and my wife) make barely enough money to cover our family’s living expenses (and we are not high-maintenance).

And finally, no matter what I do, there still are students who have done no work whatsoever but have the nerve to scold me (preferably in public places) — as if we teachers were some sort of human scum. And I think these truths are so inconvenient our ministry (quite like some of our students) won’t even admit them.

So, if you’re going trick-or-treating or partying today (happy Halloween!), you might as well dress up as a teacher. You have my blessing.

Actually, it’s not what you think. I am not about to confess some ill-developed craving for female breasts. Instead, I want to make yet another comment on the (in)famous Barbie doll.

As a boy (and growing up in a Communist country) I, quite naturally, never had access to a Barbie. But now, a father of two beautiful daughters, it was just a matter of time when I would have to face the harsh reality of the B-world.

We’ve actually had some fake Barbie dolls for a while. Horrid as they are, you know kids want what their friends have. But the greatest evil (OK, maybe I’m exaggerating a bit) seized us last Friday when a real Barbie doll was given to us by a friend of my mother-in-law.

So, the kids (mainly the older one, Les) have been playing with it since. And everything seemed OK. Until the day came that I would rue having brought this minion of the corporate world to my home. That day was today.

Les was packing her stuff for a weekend at grandma’s. Among other things, she was taking her Barbie doll. But not in the evening gown. She wanted her in the bridal dress. She slowly undid the buttons (or snaps) and pulled off the gown. And I thought, “What the…?”

The body revealed to me was more grotesque than I could have imagined it (and trust me, I had imagined it before). But the reality was even more shocking: tiny, slender tushy and humongous breasts, roughly twice the size of the waist.

I feel really sorry for Barbie. I understand now why she can never learn to walk: she constantly stands on the tips of her toes (I bet you’ve noticed it), and those boobs must really be pulling her to the ground. Wonder why Mattel never designed a wheelchair for Barbie?

Well, at last summer seems to have arrived. And in case you didn’t know, summer is a great time for picture taking. So, while holding on to my mom’s camera for a couple of days, I couldn’t miss the opportunity. Here is a mixture of the best shots: some landscape, birds and naturally, my family.

The following slideshow will take you from slumber shots into the streets of Kosice, an abandoned Jewish cemetary, and finally the playground where we’ll be spending many happy hours this summer. And remember, more of my pictures are available at PicasaWeb.